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They say if you have a million monkeys at a million typewriters writing a million words a minute, one will eventually recreate the works of Shakespeare. In this case, it’s “if you have several million Zelda players building hundreds of Zonai contraptions each day, material incentive will eventually drive one to recreate inhumane real life systems in-game.” And that’s exactly what’s happened with this automatic egg farm from r/MellowMars540.


Automatic Egg Farm (over 100 eggs every 3-4 minutes)
by u/MellowMars540 in HyruleEngineering


It works by sticking a cucco in an enclosed space above a conveyer belt that leaves just enough gaps in the edges to let eggs roll through. Strike the cucco to summon its usual demonic swarm (and activate the device), and watch as your cage of a henhouse produces hundreds of eggs every three to four minutes, in what callously prioritizes production at the cost of the cucco’s well-being. Of course, such rapacious oppression is taking place in a video game, and thus not harmful to any actual animals – if anything, longtime Zelda players may feel deep catharsis in finally getting one over on the feathered fiends. 

We await the day that Zonai engineers somehow use their Ultrahand to recreate the 60-hour work week. 


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Written by Amelia Fruzzetti

A writer and Nintendo fan based in Seattle, Washington. When not working for NinWire, she can be found eating pasta, writing stories, and wondering about when Mother 3 is finally going to get an official localization.