Welcome to Speedrun Sunday: that sadistic time of the week when we dare to challenge both your D-pad’s durability and sanity’s stamina with the ultimate test in video game bragging rights.

Hot off the dirt-clad kicks of our SteamWorld Dig 2 challenge comes yet another ruthless run that will leave you plumply pulverized into ground beef. That’s right, fans of well-done misdeeds and perfectly seared platformers: We’re raising our forks for a scrumptious serving of Super Meat Boy speedrunning the likes of which Cotton Alley’s never seen.

THE CHALLENGE

Who can beat Cotton Alley’s final stage (7-20: 4 Letter Word) the fastest in Super Meat Boy?

Our claim to fame is 00:40:74, which shouldn’t be too hard to beat for all you culinary connoisseurs with a palette for platforming. The speediest steak with the fastest time by Monday morning will win a coveted $10 eShop card (North America), along with the illustrious title of Prime Cut Bandaged Beef.

THE RULES

  • All participants must play as Bandage Girl, the default character for the course.
  • All submissions must be made with the Switch’s capture button, more specifically an image of your leaderboard score for World 7-20 (as shown in the image below). If you can find a way to share a full replay, even better!
  • The deadline for submissions is left intentionally vague to discourage last minute lurking. Make sure to share your times the moment you get them so you don’t miss out on the prize!
  • If your Twitter handle doesn’t match your leaderboard score, make sure to scribble your online alias using the Switch’s editing feature so we know it was you.
  • Feel free to improve upon and submit new scores as many times as you like.
  • Switch version only.

Follow @NinWire and @cityw0k on Twitter and retweet this post to qualify for today’s cash prize. After that, simply share your snapshot in the Twitter comments and we’ll personally send both the prize and a social media shoutout Monday afternoon.

Remember, we’ll be keeping score right here in the article all day, too, so you can easily keep track where your top rivals rank. Also, feel free to tune in to our Super Meat Boy livestream at 4:00 p.m. PST where I’ll personally be contending alongside today’s top competitors for fame and glory.

So whaddya say? Ready to jump in the grinder and put your platforming prowess to the test? Then quit being such a damsel in distress and kick that crude dude Dr. Fetus where where the sun don’t shine.


Prime Cut Bandaged Beef

1. @cityw0k [00:40:74]

Sorry Sacks Spoiled Rotten

2. @peterfieldsart [00:42:17]
3. @JediMazterAndy [00:57:37]
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Written by Matthew Weidner

When it comes to playing and writing about video games, Matthew aspires to be the very best, like no one ever was. Writing for Nintendo Wire and the thought of one day finally achieving a perfect, no death Super Meat Boy run fills him with determination.

Matthew Weidner