Nintendo Magazine has released its Winter 2020 issue, and while most of it is the usual advertisements and notices about Switch games, its cover has brought with it a new art of Mario bundled up for the weather. And while utterly adorable from the high-detail snowflake drifting from above to the little puff of air escaping Mario’s nose, it brings with it a number of logical questions about Mario and the world he inhabits.

In his previous adventures, Mario was shown to have braved sub-zero conditions in nothing but his trusty cap and overalls, leading one to presume he’s naturally warm-blooded. So what utterly chilling conditions would he have to experience in order to put on a scarf? Yes, one bringing in outside ideas of creativity and marketing would quickly find a justification (it would be cute to see him in a scarf, and draw attention to the magazine and the wider Nintendo brand), but as a Certified Internet Video Game Smart Person, I’m not supposed to consider the wider pragmatic real-world reasons for artistic decisions, and instead only talk about in-universe LORE.

 

 

In addition to the Mario cover art, the magazine also features a three-month calendar showing Peach and Toad all decked out in holiday apparel — which just raises more questions. Given the fir tree and the gift-giving, the two appear to be celebrating some form of Christmas — is Christmas a holiday in the Mushroom Kingdom? If so, does that mean Jesus Christ is canon to Mario lore? Christmas trees were (arguably) brought about as a Lutheran tradition, so did the Ptotestant Reformation happen in the Mario universe? Sure, the art is the most heckin’ cute thing imaginable and about as wholesome or inoffensive as a piece of media can be, but what about the LORE? Please enjoy the holidays as I angst over these questions that Do Not Actually Matter.

 

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Written by Amelia Fruzzetti

A writer and Nintendo fan based in Seattle, Washington. When not working for NinWire, she can be found eating pasta, writing stories, and wondering about when Mother 3 is finally going to get an official localization.

Amelia Fruzzetti

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